My brother taught me

I’m Amy, I’m 19 and I live with my mum in Shepparton, Victoria.

I get up and make breakfast. There are times when I help her get dressed in the morning. I make sure she has lunch, and then at night,  make sure she has her medicine. I’m also a carer for my grandfather. He has seizures. He doesn’t actually live at home with us, so sometimes I have to drop what I’m doing and go see him to make sure he’s okay.

I’m all over the place. There are moments when I feel in control and moments when that’s been taken away. On a good day, my grandfather and Mum don’t need to go to the hospital. I’m able to do stuff for me. On a bad day, my mum is having a moment and is really depressed and can’t move. Or she’s really elevated and manic, and I have to try and stop her doing something. I’m her whole support network, so I have to be there all the time.

I’m studying at TAFE, doing hairdressing and make-up. My goal is to one day live over in South Korea and work as a beautician. I love K-Pop.

Mum’s been sick ever since I was a child. But for a while my brother was looking after her. Then he left and moved to Sydney to do uni and I had to step in. I had to drop out of high school to look after Mum. That was the start of my caring role.

Back when I was in high school, there were periods where I didn’t go to school because I was looking after mum. Then I returned after a long absence I explained to a teacher about my caring role.  He actually turned around in front of everyone and said, “That’s no excuse. You’re a wagger”.’ Looking back, I wish I’d stood up to him. Know your rights too. They can’t discriminate against you because you’re a carer. Not every teacher’s going to be like that. A lot of them genuinely want to help. Find those teachers and ask if they can help explain where you’re coming from.

In the early part, when my brother was around, I watched him look after mum. How he handled being a carer. How he talked to doctors, and stayed calm, at least most of the time. Having my brother around meant that when I became a carer, I didn’t have to start from nowhere. I was able to grow by looking at him, and learning from him.

Other stories

My role as a young carer

Hi, my name is Hannah and I’m a young carer for my mum and my two brothers. My hobbies include sewing and crafts. My normal day would start with get up, get dressed, help mum pack lunch and help get my little brother dressed and ready for school. After school I would come home eat […]
Read full story

The only one in Australia

My name is Izzy, I am 17 years old and I am a Clinical Support Worker. I am the second eldest in my family. I live at home with my mum, little brother and baby sister. For the past 3 years I have helped my mum who is a single parent care for my baby […]
Read full story

Growth

Growing up you learn something new every day. Being the oldest child and only girl, it is evident that I should support my family. My dad had a very severe accident at work just under two years ago now. I help him all the time. It’s sometimes hard for me to juggle all this and […]
Read full story